...my life is a GODDAMN MESS

White Trash.
Petty Theft.
Spilled Beer.
Wiggers.
Rum & Coke.
Unfettered Idiocy.
Broken-down cars.
Bad Rap Music.

Trailer Park Boys on DVD? Or what I went through on my trip to Wal-Mart to buy it?

You decide.

</RANT>

Yes...I like that much better than my original version of this, which consisted solely of the phrase "Yeah...more like 'We suck Balls-mart!!!!1"

My office smells like Weezer Tickets

Everywhere I go, I smell Vanilla. But oh no, I haven't gone mental or anything. Actually, I lie. Today we opened the pool. The pool definitely did not smell like vanilla.

Scarborough has a brand new department store.

Huzzah!

I saw X2 last night, and in many ways, it was great, but other parts left me wondering why everyone's been raving about it. Professor Xavier isn't supposed to be a chump.

And Alan Cummings should never ever do a German accent. Especially in a movie where it added nothing to the character. They conveniently forgot that Colossus was Russian, so why bother with making Nightcrawler German? Oh well, I'm getting nitpicky.

In my family's eyes, I'm now officially the enemy. Oh well, now I have a fine excuse for not talking to them, and getting them off my back. So, in every conceivable way, I win!

I much prefer my printer this way, instead of sending me anonymous death threats.

And while my life is unquestionably a screwed up mess, my printer appears to be deleriously happy to have gotten fresh colour ink. So happy in fact, that it spit out a piece of paper with the image to the left on it.

Nothing else...I guess it just wanted me to know how much it appreciated the ink. You're welcome, Hewlett Packard Photosmart P1115! Now please don't run out of ink again until 2005 or so, because ink costs more than diamonds.

Fridays. Clear winner. No contest.

*hic*

MARLA
I saw you practicing this.

JACK
What?

MARLA
-- Telling me off. Is it going as well as you thought it would?

I died!!!

I am the smartest man alive! Well, not really, but I got a lot of answers, and earned my drinks for the night

And I single-handedly got all our points in the music round. Okay, except one. AND GARY NEUMAN IS NOT A ONE-HIT WONDER!

The used book stores lining Yonge Street are one of those rare treasures that make life worth living.

On the other hand, most of them have porn sections, and used porn creeps me the hell out.